OH NO!

 I must write some songs soon - I mean, how hard could it be?

I like this one and could do as good - particularly in the lyrics department.

MAD ON A TUNE (PART ONE)

 You know that The Curmudgeons Incⓒ brings you the latest innovation in posting so it won't come as a surprise that, for the first time in this blogging community we introduce a post that's a collaboration of two bloggers - myself, The Music Curmudgeon and another The Curmudgeons Incⓒ blogger, The Religious Curmudgeon.

No need to thank us.

Due to the overwhelming success of the 'concept' post "THINGS WERE DESPERATE UP NORTH" we've written this new post titled MAD ON A TUNE.

Given the religious theme, which is almost as important as the music theme, The Religious Curmudgeon joins me in the selection and the presentation of the songs. This is kind of like those silly old duffers Phil O'Brien and Simon Morris who've been presenting the holiday music show Matinee Idle since Christ was a cowboy.

The Religious Curmudgeon ...

... and I will provide some banter like Phil and Simon do. We're not as old as those old twats so our banter will be fresher with a bit more Mmmmm (an old coffee joke there that'll appeal to the old instant coffee drinkers who follow our blogs).

This list will not be definitive. It could be, I assure you but there's an old ex schoolteacher who reads these blogs and finds it hard to concentrate. There's also an old toilet cleaner who has difficulty reading anything that doesn't include his own name and/or reference to Jesus or The Holy Ghost. Fortunately this post has The Madonna as its theme and we know that this guy has a fetish unhealthy interest passion for The Virgin Mary and has been known to photograph statues of her and keep these in a secret photo album. In the interests of brevity we have shoRtened the list to 12.

ONE

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: First up is 'Food For Thought (Ivory Madonna)' by UB40.

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: "Ivory madonna dying in the dust, waiting for the manna coming from the west."  Ha ha - I thought the lyrics to this were I'm a prima donna, dining out on toast.

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: Well it's not bloody funny matey. The song was inspired by the massacre of Kampuchea, which was a state existing from 1975 to 1979 in what is now Cambodia. It was run by the Khmer Rouge, a Communist group that controlled the state with an iron fist and murdered all who opposed it.

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Sheesh! Just as well I didn't mention what I thought the rest of that lyric was. This is starting out well.

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: well.... listen:

TWO

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: (sulking).

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: OK, sulk then. I'll take your turn with the second choice. Any search of music with 'Madonna' in the title or lyrics predictably turns up that awful scrawny old tart who goes by the stage name Madonna, commonly known as Mags. Personally I can't stand her but I suppose that you do given your insensitivity to religion, politics, society and decency in general ..... wait .... let me finish. This Madonna tart has used religious themes in her songs for sensationalist reasons - take the song 'Like a Virgin' for example. I know one old catholic guy that will get upset and/or excited by that. My choice though, to get this Madonna person out of the way is the song 'Like a Prayer' This was controversial as it featured Mags dancing in front of burning crosses, experiencing stigmata and kissing a statue of a Black Jesus who comes to life in a church.

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Robert will be conflicted then. He'll like it and hate it at the same time. Good choice.

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: Ah - you're back then. Thanks. Watch this:

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: That was truly awful - she's going to hell for sure. Thank Robert's god that we got that out of the way. I'll have a go now but I'll find something that doesn't have 'madonna' in the theme or title. How about the Virgin Mary?

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: fill your boots man.

THREE

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: OK.  We've given Robert a bit of stick already which is unfair - or at least unfair so early in this 'concept' post so, especially for him I think a Marion antiphon is called for. as you know The Religious Curmudgeon, Marian antiphons are a group of hymns in the Gregorian chant repertory of the Catholic Church, sung in honour of the Virgin Mary.

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: Er , yeah, yeah I knew that ...

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: OK. here goes:

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: That was really horrible - worse than old Mags's caterwauling.

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Yeah, sorry about that. We'd better get some decent Gregorian stuff in to make up for it. Try this:

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: That's better even if it didn't feature Mary the virgin. You'd better have another turn.

FOUR

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Like Charles Mingus who we referenced in that last post who plays too much double bass music, I've found that songs about Mary have too many damned religious references. I thought I'd break things up a bit with a song from one of my favourite bands from the 1970s - Jethro Tull. Here's 'Cross-Eyed Mary' for your education, edification and elucidation...

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: (sotto voce) Wanker.

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: what's that?

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: Aqualung I said. It's from that album.

FIVE

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: My turn again. I think we're drifting away from the 'madonna' theme. I thought that it'd be easy. Maybe that old guy Richard was right and a theme of storms would have been better. We're used to storms up here and there are some good songs about storms. I can think of ....

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Franklin!

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: What?

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Aretha Franklin. She did that excellent 'Mary Don't You Weep' song.

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: Oh, I thought that now you were calling me a wanker.

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: No - why would I ...hey!

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: OK - moving on. It was supposed to be my turn but I'll accept that. I love Aretha Franklin's songs. Listen to this:

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Great. That leaves old Mags in the dust.

THE RELIGIOUS CURMUDGEON: Ivory madonna dying in the dust?

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: Ha ha - I see what you did there.

SIX

THE MUSIC CURMUDGEON: My turn again. Aretha's going to be a hard act to follow but I'll give it a try. As I get older - and no funny comments because I happen to know that you're exactly the same age as me - I've harked back to things from my past. When it comes to music  the seminal influence obviously has been 1960s music. While I didn't like all of the songs that 'got into my head' some I did and others just kind of sat there. The Monkees are a good example. In many ways they were naff and the TV show was kind of stupid but the songs, particularly the Neil Diamond penned ones were pretty good. This next song I put in the 'got into my head' category. It never was a favourite but I do remember at the time driving my youngest sister nuts by saying to her when ever I saw her "Mary Mary - where're you going to?"

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THE CURMUDGEON: Well done guys, I couldn't have done better myself. Let's have a break now and call the above PART ONE. We can continue with the rest of the 12 songs in PART TWO should it be necessary. I want to get some feedback from the readers first. I also have to get on with cooking dinner - Pasta Siciliana, that orange and kumara dish I love and The Old Girl doesn't. I'll make enough for my dinner tonight and tomorrow night. I love this dish.

"THINGS WERE DESPERATE UP NORTH"

Being indoors on a rainy day - actually a long rainy week I watched videos and documentaries on YouTube on the TV. One of the docos I watched was about pop/rock music from the 1960s and 1970s and the emergence of 'concept' albums.

This gave me a great idea that I thought that I'm obliged to share with you. Maybe The Music Curmudgeon could write 'concept' blog posts. BINGO!

The first will be  a look at what songs are applicable to each day of the week. Now I'm not saying that these are definitive as there are just so many songs out there with days of the week in the titles - they are my choices and, in some cases the overwhelming most popular choices.

 

MONDAY

There are lots of songs about Monday but we would be remiss for not selecting the Mama's and Poppa's song 'Monday Monday'.

It's not my favourite but in this concept series we will often be looking at the most popular options.

I prefer 'Blue Monday' by New Order

 TUESDAY

The 'biggie' of course is 'Tuesday Afternoon' by The Moody Blues. Back in about 1969 I would have voted this top as well.

I prefer The Pogues 'Tuesday Morning' now. The sound is a lot like the 'Dunedin' sound in 1980's New Zealand released by Flying Nun Records as popularised by The Verlaines, The Chills, Toy Love and The Clean. great stuff.

WEDNESDAY

It's hard to go past the talented Paul Simon and 'Wednesday Morning 3AM' is still good and no doubt the most popular of the Wednesday songs.

Charles Mingus' s 'Wednesday Night Prayer Meeting' is pretty damned good though. Mingus isn't first favourite of mine in Jazz music (too much damned double bass) but I was listening to him on Miles Davis's 'Blue Moods' album the other night while I was playing snooker (the stereo system is in the snooker room).

THURSDAY

Maybe not the 'biggie' here but, in its day DD Smash's 'Outlook for Thursday' was pretty popular. Dave Dobbyn, like Neil Finn is a really good songwriter. I like this.

For something a bit darker though with some scary undercurrent check out David Bowie's 'Thursday's Child'. Be careful.

FRIDAY

For guys of our age there's no contest for the first pick. The Easybeats 'Friday On My Mind' pretty much defined the 1960s and our priorities. Still sounds damned good.

In later years though I discovered Steely Dan which, to me, is the best by far rock/pop band. I'm so glad I saw Becker and Fagen playing in Auckland a few years ago before Walter Becker died.

SATURDAY

Yes I know Elton John is famous for his 'Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting' song but Elton John's not for me. I'll go back to David Bowie whose 'Drive In Saturday' was just as big and a whole lot better. This is really good - buddy!

'Saturday Night At The Movies' by The Drifters is classy but for older class I'll go with Sam Cooke's 'Another Saturday Night'. Lovely.

SUNDAY

The 'biggie' no doubt is U2's 'Sunday Bloody Sunday' and I'd better put it here because I did say that we'd be looking at the most popular options.

For me though, my youth was defined by the 1960s British music from the likes of Cream, Traffic, Rolling Sones etc but especially The Small Faces. This song, 'Lazy Sunday Afternoon' I adored when at school in about the fifth form.

I trust that you enjoyed this 'concept'. who knows it could be extended into months of the year, seasons of the year (Vivaldi and Stravinsky wrote some tunes about these), planets (Holst will be at the forefront there but The Moody Blues could give him a run for his money not to mention Alabama 5 with 'Woke Up This Morning').

Stay posted!

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS SONG WAS BANNED BY US RADIO STATIONS?

 The Curmudgeon, in a recent post mentioned a couple of one-hit wonders that still resonate:

There are some others that I like - and, thinking of them this morning there's one song that I can't get out of my mind - 'A horse with no name' by America.

Now. I know that America had other songs and maybe hits but this song is the only one I can think they did.

Wikipedia informs me that:

"Originally called "Desert Song", "Horse" was written while the band was staying at the home of studio musician Arthur Brown, near Puddleton, Dorset. The first two demos were recorded there by Jeff Dexter and Dennis Elliott, which were intended to capture the sensation of the hot, dry desert that had been depicted in a Salvador Dali painting, and in a picture by M.C. Escher which featured a horse. Writer Dewey Bunnell also says he remembered his childhood travels through the Arizona and New Mexico desert when his family lived at Vandenberg Air Force Base. Bunnell has explained that "A Horse with No Name" was "a metaphor for a vehicle to get away from life's confusion into a quiet, peaceful place"."

OK, probably a bit too much information but for the music geeks in this blogging community - two thirds of the community at last count here's some incomprehensible music blurb:

"Blah blah blah blah blah Robert blah blah blah blah Richard blah blah bla ....."

Sorry, I was still thinking of that Gary Larson cartoon that The Curmudgeon posted - the one that Robert either didn't read or didn't understand.

Here's the Wikipedia quote I was looking for.

"Composition.

"A Horse with No Name" was recorded in E minor with acoustic guitars, bass guitar, drum kit, and bongo drums. The only other chord is a D, fretted on the low E and G strings, second fret. A 12-string guitar plays an added F♯ (second fret, high E string) on the back beat of the Em. A noted feature of the song is the driving bass line with a hammer-hook in each chorus. A "waterfall"-type solo completes the arrangement. Produced by Ian Samwell on the day of final recording at Morgan Studios, when at first the group thought it was too corny and took some convincing to actually play it. Gerry Beckley has explained in 'Acoustic Guitar' magazine (March 2007) that the correct tuning for the guitar is D E D G B D, low to high. The chord pattern that repeats throughout the entire song is: 202002 (Em), then 020202 and 000202. The tuning is unique to this song; they did not use it on any other America song."

Got that.? Maybe you should just go back and listen to the song again.

Here's a relevant cartoon I like:

 

HEY YOU!

Hey you, out there in the cold

Getting lonely, getting old
Can you feel me?

Well, not us today. We've had a cracker of a day here - probably the hottest for a while. I know that Richard will complain about the brevity of this post but then, who's he to talk? His frequency of posting seems nowadays to be directly opposite to his frequency of urination in the middle of the night. Let's just be thankful that he doesn't blog in bed.

I must admit that this post was inspired by The Twitter Curmudgeon's new post OI YOU!

Have a nice evening.

ACCIDENTALS

 No doubt Richard and Robert, being musicians or at least musically oriented, have many stories about the silly things that they've done while playing their instruments and mistakes and disasters that have befallen them. It's only natural.

I'm not a musician, only a listener to music but I've done some silly things in album purchasing, concert attendance and choice of listening.

Here are some of them.

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Back in about 1984 I went into a record store (remember those?) in Queen street Auckland to buy two albums - Frankie Goes To Hollywood's Welcome to the Pleasuredome and Bronski Beat's The Age of Consent. The songs from these albums were hits on the radio at the time and I liked the Two Tribes song of Frankie's  and Smalltown Boy of Bronski's.

When I took these to the counter and purchased them I was aware of the shop assistant making some smart remark (which I could't hear) to his colleague and his smirking manner. I didn't think much of it at the time but later, when I discovered that both of these albums were Gay 'anthems' the penny dropped. I wish that I'd know at the time because I would have thrown them back at him and asked to cancel the sale. This would have nothing to the gay thing but everything to do with the tosser's attitude. I liked the songs and still do:

Thinking back on it I was a bit naive as to the content of the songs and albums but at the time always listened to the music stations when driving and I guess approached the music in a superficial way.

**************

In about 2000 The Old Girl and I went to a concert at the Bruce Mason Centre in Auckland to 'see' St Germaine play. Some friends encouraged this and bought the tickets. We'd heard the music at their place once from an album titled Tourist.

We arrived on time but it seemed to take ages for the 'band' to arrive and eventually there was just one guy, a stage hand we assumed, who came on to tinker with the electronic equipment and to do sound checks. This went on for ages as the lights dimmed. We waited and waited for the band to come on stage while this turkey did more checks and made more sounds and were getting quite indignant. After about 15 minutes, when he briefly stopped and the audience applauded did we realise that this was St Germaine. It was a 'house/Jazz' DJ thing. The guy has the stage name St Germaine. His actual name is Ludovic Navarre. After a lot more noise we eventually recognised some of the music but overall weren't impressed. We left early.

***************

In 2012 we had an apartment in Auckland Central close to the Town Hall. The Old Girl asked me if I wanted to go to the Lucinda Williams concert at the town hall. "Hell yeah" I answered and so she bought some good tickets in the Circle with a good view of the stage.

When we arrived, with some friends, I said to the others that The audience didn't look quite like Lucinda Williams followers. They looked at me funny. It wasn't until we went in that I realised that I didn't know anything about Lucinda Williams at all.

I had been thinking of Tracey Chapman so was very disappointed.

I didn't like Lucinda Williams. My C&W tastes run more to Bonnie Raitt and Emmy-Lou Harris both of whom I've seen in concerts.

****************

One of my favourite bands in the  early days was Jethro Tull so when I saw that Ian Anderson was to play in concert, again at The Auckland Town Hall I rushed to get a ticket.

Here's what happened.

THICK AS A BRICK

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Well that's a few that come to mind. There are many more, not even counting the silly stuff that I (and I guess we all) listened to when very young like The Moody Blues. If there's enough interest I'll do a follow up post later.

THE WORM TURNS

 

I read an interesting article in the latest Listener - 'The really bad news' by Stephen Davis. (NZ Listener September 24 2022).

In this article Davis discusses a UK media report "The Kids Aren't Alright" from UK Think Tank Onward which proposed that there is evidence that young people are turning away from democracy and looking to autocratic, even fascist ruling in the future.

The summary of the report said that 61% of 18-34 year olds agree that having a strong leader who does not have to bother with Parliament and elections would be a good way to run the country (UK) and 46% agree that having the army rule would be a good way of governing the country (UK). Bloody hell! This is the sort of nonsense that Trump and his misguided inner circle proposed in their support of Putin, Erdogan, Xi Jinping, Kim Jong-un and other world 'strong leaders'. Trump supported these types because he himself liked the idea of being a respected strongman with unlimited powers and an endless rule. The fascist oriented white power supporters to his cause are no different to those in the rise of white supremacy and neo-fascism in Europe that is attracting strong support from younger voters. In the 2022 French elections nearly half of 25-34 year olds voted for the fascist populist Marine Le Pin.

This is very disturbing and doesn't bode well for the second quarter of this century. Us older people, the 'baby boomers' and generation x have, and have had, direct connection with parents, grandparents and others who experienced or saw fascism, autocratic rule and the devastating effects of World War Two. This has kept our eyes open to the dangers of extremism and unfettered powers and maybe, has helped keep the lid on things relatively speaking. The younger generations haven't felt this connection and their influences have more come from the entertainment industry (cinema TV and gaming) and less governed and responsible social media. It's not surprising to see the movement show in that report given that they are looking for an easy fix to crime, global warming, social and economic inequality and cannot see the existing political systems being applicable to them.

I'm rather glad that I'll be dead and gone in the second quarter but feel sorry for those left behind who will likely  be under the heel of dictatorship governments.

**************************

Reading that article made me think of  the 1982 film Pink Floyd: The Wall (Alan Parker and Gerald Scarfe)  where fascist iconography is used to demonstrate the protagonist's (and millions of disaffected youth's) feeling of alienation and a blind willingness to embrace a dodgy philosophy to make up for pains and losses experienced or perceived in the 'real world'.

This clip, to me, is prescient:

WAITING FOR THE WORMS